#PressPlay: did #ZoeKravitz nail the #NickiMinajChallenge, #Roommates!?

A post shared by The Shade Room (@theshaderoom) on Jun 15, 2017 at 11:36am PDT

For the past week, we’ve seen social media spin Nicki Minaj’s theatrical, Prague-boasting PSA into a viral challenge dubbed the #NickiMinajChallenege. From single parents holding down their personal and professional lives to chicks schooling all how to pull up to the super market after collecting food stamps at the welfare office, everyone is getting in on the fun — including Zoë Kravitz.

“Attention, this is how a bad b***h leaves her hotel to go do Good Morning America,” Kravitz boasted in the clip, where she’s seen holding a miniature tea cup while decked out in a fancy, blush-tone frock from Sies Marjan, a velvet The Row bag, and large black sunglasses. “Y’all b***hes can’t even spell Good Morning America,” she concluded, sauntering off down the hallway with a fierce strut.

We see you, Kravitz. Share with us some of your favorite videos from the #NickiMinajChallenege in the comment section below.

The post Watch Zoë Kravitz Nail The #NickiMinajChallenge appeared first on MadameNoire.

You worry about your faces

In fact, you hide your face

You monitor your lube use

He keeps asking if you’re okay

You’re not even a little tired after

You worry about your noises

You must have the lights off

You’re concerned about your smell down there

You study up before trying something

You need things mapped out

You can’t orgasm from oral

You won’t let him watch you

The words, “Can we try something?” scare you

You’ve never done it out of the bed

Your sheets stay in place

The post Can You Stand To Loosen Up In Bed? appeared first on MadameNoire.

Earlier this month, Tamar Braxton and Tameka “Tiny” Harris seemed to mend a friendship that had been on the rocks for some time now. We don’t 100 percent know when things went south, but after Tiny shared a post celebrating her godson, Logan Herbert, on his birthday, Braxton responded with a lengthy post apologizing for her part in their issues. And even though it should have been a simple, heartfelt note, Braxton made an effort to throw in some shade about former friend Toya Wright and her book, In My Own Words…My REAL Reality.

It was slight shade, but still messy.

Toya would respond with a very, well, let’s just say strong, expletive-laden clapback:

Paperback Toya?? Really B—h??! What does your non-sincere apology and fake a– public outreach have to do with me?? You are THE fakest b—h I know. You wrote all of that pathetic, attention seeking bulls–t but you conveniently forgot to tell them why ur REALLY mad?? Speak up l…tell em why you and your so-called best friend of 19 years fell out. Why didn’t you tell them how petty you really are? What type of b—h gets mad because a friend posts a birthday message about another friend?? I have your answer tho 👉🏾the same petty a– b—h that got mad At EVERYONE who went on the real talk show that she was FIRED from. I’m sick of you popping off on everybody and then playing victim with yo over the top under the table a–. You talk s–t about your own sisters! U a disrespectful, disloyal, jealous attention fiend. Your desire to be front and center and have all the attention even spilled over into to the church! People trying hear the Lord’s word and you want the people to watch u work! Fake a– praise! F–k You all days and all ways Tamar! Love always, Paperback Toya💋. My new book will be dropping in July!💰 #ihavetimetoday #iapologizetomyfollowers #shekeepplayingwithme #sometimethenolahavetocomeout

Braxton opened up about that uncomfortable Instagram squabble in a new interview with V-103’s Big Tigger, and to be clear, she says, “I don’t go back and forth with anybody, not even the devil. I don’t.”

She also said that she doesn’t want any of her friends, current and former, to think that she would ever make an effort to hold them back from anything, including from going on her former talk show, The Real.

“The whole thing came about because the day before it was Logan’s birthday,” Braxton said. “I got tagged on a ‘Happy birthday to Logan’ from Tiny, which is Logan’s godmom. Tip was saying on the Instagram that me and Tiny need to stop being a diva and make up. So, I just thought it was the sweetest gesture ever. That’s why I decided to send a public apology to my dearest friend, Tiny, on the planet. I felt like they made the attempt to extend an olive branch. I wasn’t trying to hurt anybody, definitely. I’m never trying to hurt anybody but I kind of just wanted to state the facts that it’s just been a lot of speculation that because Tiny and I had a friendship falling out, it wasn’t about what people had been saying. It wasn’t about that show. It wasn’t about the things Toya was saying because she did go on a media tour and wrote a book about how she felt like I was a horrible friend and that was hurtful to me.”

Braxton said she had no knowledge before Wright’s book and tour that they were no longer friends and said things went even more south when she couldn’t promote it on social media.

“That was the first time I’d seen it, which was on a radio station. I didn’t know we wasn’t friends,” Braxton said. “I never want anyone to think I’m trying to hold them back. I’m not even that kind of girl. I don’t even think like that. When I was on that show, [Toya Wright] never even reached out to me and said she wanted to be on the show. Now I’m not the talent booker, I’m the talent [laughs]. I have absolutely no power on who comes on the show, and that’s just how it goes. Come to find out, she also got upset because I didn’t post about her last book, but I don’t have to tell you Tigga, when you work for certain companies, they don’t want you to tweet about or Instagram certain things. And that’s in your contract, you know what I mean? Especially when you work for a corporation. And so you have to kind of run things by them. They didn’t really dig it. And I told her what they said and I guess she didn’t believe me or didn’t want to go with it.”

Braxton stands by the fact that she has no desire or interest in trying to stifle the efforts of other women, especially her friends, whether they want to go on her former talk show (which she wouldn’t name) or write a book.

“Toya, if you’re listening, baby, I have absolutely, positively, no reason to stop you from getting your shine on. I love you, I love Reginae, you know I love the whole clique,” she said. “I want everybody to win. I have absolutely no reason to hold anybody back. I am blessed beyond measure, and for me not to extend those blessings to my friends, which I do, I mean, that would be horrible for me. I’m not even that kind of person.”

As for comments from people that her diva behavior has also played a big part in the deterioration of her friendships, she said that’s false.

“That’s not what I do,” Braxton said. “I’m going to act like a diva to get what? I feel like I make a conscious choice every single day to be a good person. Because you can either be a good person or a bad person and I make the choice to be a good person. So, I don’t know where she got that from. That was hurtful. It was all hurtful. It was hurtful to know that it was a nice gesture that I went to her brother’s funeral and that I basically, economically, made sure all of her friends were there. That was hurtful. And it’s also very hurtful to feel that your friends think a certain way about you behind your back.”

Check out her thoughts on the situation, which start at the 2-minute mark and share your own below.

The post Tamar Braxton Says She Still Loves Toya Wright, Has “No Reason” To Try And Hold Her Back appeared first on MadameNoire.

Credit: Lia Toby/WENN.com

Credit: WENN.com

Credit: WENN.com

Credit: Andres Otero/WENN.com

Credit: FayesVision/WENN.com

Credit: FayesVision/WENN.com

Credit: Adriana M. Barraza / WENN

Credit: Kento Nara/Future Image/WENN.com

Credit: WENN.com

Credit: Adriana M. Barraza/WENN.com

Credit: WENN

Credit: WENN

Credit: FayesVision/WENN.com

Credit: FayesVision/WENN.com

The post 14 Of Zoe Saldana’s Most Eye-Catching Ensembles appeared first on MadameNoire.

Summer is finally upon us! Toes are out, temps are soaring into the triple digits and every grill this side of the hemisphere is polished and ready to go.

I don’t know about you, but between Memorial Day and now, I’ve consumed my fair share of grilled meats and then some. My body is a little heavier, and after recently completing my first 10K race, I’m doing my best to cut down on meat and eat a little lighter. #summerbody right?

When you think of salads, most people gravitate toward your average Caesar, or some variation with lettuce. I’m going to open up your taste buds and get you to try a bevy of other greens and ingredients you likely wouldn’t pair together! Greens such as Kale, Swiss chard, Arugula, and Spinach, to name a few, are chock full of nutritional benefits that rival our fleshy need for sustenance.

In this Quinoa Salad recipe I’ve chosen Arugula as my base green for its light texture, and distinct “bite.”

Since it’s “Meatless Monday,” I’ve had to do some work to pair ingredients that are great substitutes for animal protein, taste good, and at the same time make me forget that I’ve just been chomping on greens for the last half hour. In comes the super food Quinoa!

Did you know that Quinoa is one of the few grains that contains 9 of the essential amino acids? Each cup (cooked) contains about 8 grams of protein, the granular equivalent of an egg or an ounce of chicken. Truthfully, the list of accolades goes on, but the ones I care about most are the health benefits and how delicious it is when cooked!

Ingredients

3 handfuls of washed Arugula

1 cup cooked Quinoa

4-5 cremini (baby bella) mushrooms

1/3 cup of chickpeas

1/3 cup of sweet corn

1/3 cup of grated carrots

Paprika

Salt

Salad dressing of your choice

Instructions

Over running water, rinse out your Quinoa and cook according to package directions. It’s important to rinse out your Quinoa before you cook it to take away the bitter taste. Use two cups of water per one cup of Quinoa. Lightly season with salt (optional) and bring to a boil. Turn down the heat and simmer til the water is absorbed. Transfer to a baking sheet or large surface and spread out to cool quickly. At this point you can grate your carrots and toss in with the warm Quinoa and set aside to cool.

Over medium – high heat,  pan roast your chickpeas in olive oil and toss in a light coating of paprika. Roast until the chickpeas take on a bit of a character or are crispy to taste.  Remove from flame, set aside and cool.

The next step is to sautée the mushrooms. There are two kinds of mushrooms, soggy and gray or tender and browned. The trick to having restaurant level mushrooms is to pan sear them over high heat, giving no room for them to sweat, and adding salt at the end so that the water isn’t drawn out of the mushrooms too early. Over high heat, drop in a tablespoon of olive oil and toss in your mushrooms til they start to take on color. Remove from pan, set aside and cool.

Next, assemble your salad. This is where all your hard work comes together. On a bed of arugula, toss in your roasted chickpeas, sautéed mushrooms, sweet corn, and Quinoa.

Lightly toss with a light salad dressing of your choice (vinaigrettes work best) and enjoy the meat-free fruits of your labor.

If you have left overs, you could totally skip out on “Taco Tuesday” and be an awesome mean green machine.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this recipe. Let us know what you think!, if you tried it and any recipe or food suggestions you’d like to see next.

The post Meatless Monday How-To: Arugula Quinoa Salad appeared first on MadameNoire.

Of all the things an athlete prepares for and thinks about ahead of a competition, the one thing they probably aren’t giving that much thought about is hair. And why should you? You’re about to put on a pretty important performance you’ve been training long and hard for, and as long as your body is ready, who cares about your hair?

Well, a lot of people cared about 28-year-old Nigerian Olympic track and field athlete Blessing Okagbare’s. While participating in the long jump during an event in Norway late last week, her leap caused her long black wig to fall off in the sand, exposing a low, natural cut. The commentators during the event joked about the incident, going as far as to measure how far her hair flew, along with where her feet landed in the sand.

But Okagbare carried on, seemingly unbothered. She put on her wig cap and prepared to put back on her wig as she waited patiently for her score. No running off in embarrassment. No need to try and make a joke of herself by shrugging and laughing. She knew there was a chance it would happen, as Okagbare told reporters following the jump, and it did. But she was focused on business. In the end, Okagbare placed seventh, but still managed to get a lot of attention from journalists who interviewed her after the event because of her wig snafu.

She also got a lot of attention from people on social media. Some simply laughed at the situation, while a few defended Okagbare and others criticized her for wearing a wig in the first place. It went on and on over the weekend, with Okagbare trying to make light of the situation on Instagram, saying, “When you talk about something for so long and it eventually happened … Oh well, it is what it is then … heads up…” before changing her mind and deleting her comment.

As for my own thoughts, I couldn’t be mad at the fact that the video was getting around. It is comical in a way. But more than anything, I just felt bad. Not because Okagbare may have been embarrassed or because people were talking about her, but rather, because, per the usual, people were talking about yet another Black female athlete’s hair. You just can’t win.

For the record, she is an Olympic silver-winning medalist who has also won gold and bronze in everything from the World Championships to the Commonwealth Games and the All-Africa Games in both the long jump and sprinting. In just about every race, she’s worn a wig or weave of some sort. I’ve seen her in red ones, black ones, purple ones, blond ones, short ones, long ones — looks that have run the whole gamut. It just seems to be her style. They’ve never held her back and they’ve never garnered much discussion, not when so many other successful track and field athletes, including Jamaica’s Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce and retired American sprinter Sanya Richards-Ross, hit the track in bold hairstyles. But it’s sad to see that when I type in Okagbare’s name now, there isn’t much mention of what she’s accomplished in her more than 10 years of competing or any other real interviews with her, but instead, she’s just referenced as the “long jumper” whose “WIG falls off” and “suffers embarrassment as wig falls off.”

Somehow it’s always about our hair. In both of the Olympics Gabby Douglas took part in, she was criticized on social media over her gel-adorned ponytails, even when she was making history.

A lot of talk surrounding Simone Manuel’s win in the 100-meter freestyle in Rio last year had to do with hair, how she cares for it and why it keeps so many of us from swimming.

Sanya Richards-Ross was criticized during the 2012 Olympic games in London for wearing a weave and for wearing it down while running and winning gold in the 4×400 relay.

And as Fashionista pointed out, Venus and Serena Williams have also attracted criticism about their choice of hairstyles while competing, as have track star Carmelita Jeter, fencer Maya Lawrence and many others.

It just feels like there are too many concerns when it comes to what is going on with our heads and not when it comes to what we’re doing on the field or court. If we have a fro, people say it’s too much and should be cut. If we wear a wig, people say it’s too much and sends the wrong message to young women. If we do all of that while accomplishing our goals, people still say it’s too much, and unfortunately, a lot of the time it’s our own people.

So while it wasn’t a big deal to chuckle over the uncommon occurrence of a woman losing her wig while doing the long jump (we’re all human), that should have been it. The need to try and take things a step further, making her, as we have so many Black female athletes at the top of their game, the butt of a long, dragged out joke, just reeks of an attempt to cut them down from the pedestal they’ve worked hard to get on. And honestly, that’s just not and never will be funny.

The post Long Jumper Blessing Okagbare Loses Wig During Competition, And As Usual, Social Media Loses Its Mind appeared first on MadameNoire.

Credit: Nicky Nelson/WENN.com

They say with age comes wisdom and when it comes to Phylicia Rashad she has shared a wealth of words women can learn from her in her 69 years of life.

Most fans of “The Cosby Show” can’t see past Claire Huxtable to appreciate who Rashad is outside of her iconic character, but a quick search of some of the actress and singer’s most memorable quotes proves Rashad can teach many of us a thing or two about living. Below, we’ve comprised a list of Rashad’s most poignant words about sisterhood, self-determination, self-care, self-love, and perseverance. Let them guide you through the rest of this year as Rashad begins her 69th year of life.

Sisterhood

“Any time women come together with a collective intention, it’s a powerful thing. Whether it’s sitting down making a quilt, in a kitchen preparing a meal, in a club reading the same book, or around the table playing cards, or planning a birthday party, when women come together with a collective intention, magic happens.”

Self-love

“Loving oneself isn’t hard, when you understand who and what ‘yourself’ is. It has nothing to do with the shape of your face, the size of your eyes, the length of your hair or the quality of your clothes. It’s so beyond all of those things and it’s what gives life to everything about you. Your own self is such a treasure.”

Perseverance

“There’s always something to suggest that you’ll never be who you wanted to be. Your choice is to take it or keep on moving.”

Acceptance

“How is it that you profess love for God but can’t accept another human being?”

Motherhood

“There’s all kinds of mothers, so to use the label ‘mother’ and to think you really understood all that a human being is because she’s a mother, is a mistake.”

Self-care

“You have to learn how to care about people without taking on all of their problems.”

Self-determination

“What’s in front of you is a whole world of experiences beyond your imagination. Put yourself, and your growth and development, first.”

Consciousness

“Everything you do, every thought you have, every word you say creates a memory that you will hold in your body. It’s imprinted on you and affects you in subtle ways – ways you are not always aware of. With that in mind, be very conscious and selective.”

Tenacity

“The stubbornness I had as a child has been transmitted into perseverance. I can let go but I don’t give up. I don’t beat myself up about negative things.”

Giving

“The act of giving expands one’s entire life experience because nothing is more fulfilling than one’s capacity to give.”

The post 10 Things We Can Learn From Phylicia Rashad About Sisterhood, Self-Love, And Self-Determination appeared first on MadameNoire.

#GimmeFive Workout

Biking With Barack (and Malia)

Beating Ellen in a Push-Up Challenge

Busting a Move During Zumba

Busting a Move to Beyoncé

Doing a Football Combine With Kids

Beating Jimmy Fallon at a Fitness Test

Going for a Run

Jumping Rope Like a Pro

The post Michelle Obama Hosts Boot Camp Workout For Her Girlfriends And 9 Other Times She Was Fitness Goals appeared first on MadameNoire.

Every year Father’s Day is a controversial topic, thanks to a plethora of absentee dads and a slew of single mothers and products of single mothers all to anxious to expose the men who weren’t there for them when they needed them. But I recently discovered it’s not only past absenteeism that hurts. What about the men who are somewhat active in their childrens’ lives but decline to spend the one holiday of the year where the country actually gives a damn about fathers with their children? Is that as effed up as it sounds or should men be free to celebrate as they choose?

Yesterday, Joseline posted (and later deleted) the image below, following in the footsteps of many pained men and women who had no one to celebrate yesterday. It was obvious from the post that Stevie was missing from Bonnie Bella’s life on Father’s Day like he had been many other days over the past 10 months, but what made things worse was when the receipts came in today.

It appears Stevie was too busy lounging in murky waters filled with half-naked twerking ladies to be with Bonnie, Eva, or his other four children on Father’s Day. And while I was appalled at the scene, reactions on social media and from my own co-worker were mixed, with some asking, what do you expect (which I also agree with)? And others saying, “He is having fun on Father’s Day! Let him do what he wants today.”

Immediately, my mind trailed back to Saturday night when I was hanging with a group of people from my boxing class and one of the guys said he texted his dad to hang out the next day, which was Father’s Day, and his dad told him he already had plans. Since the guy’s siblings don’t live in New York, he knew his dad’s plans involved a woman. And though he acknowledged that was “f-cked up,” he brushed off the incident, at least in front of us, and went on enjoying the night. I, on the other hand, was still on the f-cked up part, which is pretty much how I felt the next day when I called my own dad and he didn’t answer or return my call. Considering we just got cool a couple of years ago and this is maybe one of five Father’s Days I’ve even acknowledged him, I thought he should appreciate my gesture a bit more. Twenty-four hours later, I still have’t heard from him.

I’m all for celebrating how you want to celebrate on a day that’s about you, but Father’s Day is as much for children as it is for dads and denying your children the opportunity to be with you on that day is downright selfish and dismissive. It’s one thing to say, “I don’t feel like going out,” it’s another not to even let your kids come by the house, or to push them aside for a woman — or women — who they can see at any time. If fathers want Father’s Day to be taken more seriously, maybe they should start taking it more serious themselves.

The post Serious Question: Is It Disrespectful Not To Spend Father’s Day With Your Kids? appeared first on MadameNoire.

Monica Brown has always been an open book about what’s going on in her personal life, and that includes what’s going on with her health.

The mother of three revealed in a post over the weekend that late last month, she had surgery after being diagnosed with endometriosis. She also revealed that she had a wealth of other health concerns that were addressed during her eight-hour surgery, including a hernia, fibroids and cysts:

Endometriosis is known as a disorder where the tissue that normally grows within the uterus ends up growing outside of it. It can be a painful disorder that can make your menstrual cycle a nightmare, make sex unpleasant and can also cause trouble in terms of fertility. Despite a lengthy surgery and what sounded like all types of hell for her body before, during and after it, the 36-year-old seems to be doing much better — and has a cute new pink hairstyle to boot.

The post “I’ve Known Something Was Wrong”: Monica Reveals Endometriosis Diagnosis And Surgery appeared first on MadameNoire.

You may not have noticed, but the last time Nicki Minaj attended the BET Awards was in 2015 when she went with then-boyfriend Meek Mill and they performed “All Eyes on You.” No one made a big fuss about her lack of an appearance last year (because Beyoncé returned to the stage for the first time in years — duh), but her decision to not attend this year is raising eyebrows.

It’s not because Minaj has to be there every year to accept the Best Female Hip-Hop Artist award, which she’s won every year since 2010, but rather, it’s because of the way she announced that she wouldn’t make it:

The rapper let everyone know that she would be performing at the very first NBA Awards in New York on Monday, June 26, which is the day after the BET Awards in Los Angeles. But “ONLY”? What’s that about?

Maybe it’s because people online were hyping up the possibility of there being friction between the Barbie and her rap adversary, Remy Ma. Maybe she was upset at the fact that Remy was also nominated for Best Female Hip-Hop Artist. Maybe BET did something shady behind the scenes that we don’t know about. Maybe the girl is just busy. Whatever the case, some feel that her sharp dismissal of this year’s BET Awards was like biting the hand that has fed her.

They gave star the platform to perform before most others did. That includes performing and debuting her videos on 106 & Park, performing at the old Spring Bling event, allowing her to shine at the Hip Hop Awards, the New Year’s Eve show in 2010. They’ve also given her countless awards. I wouldn’t say they “made” her whatsoever, but they definitely embraced the star’s talent and gave her a lot, including some awards when she didn’t always deserve them. (Honestly, guys, she was barely making music when she beat out Azealia Banks, Iggy Azalea, Dej Loaf, Tink and Trina for Best Female Hip-Hop Artist in 2015.) And they awarded her when other shows, like the Grammys (where she’s been awarded 0 gramophones) and the VMAs (where she’s only won three out of nine awards since her debut) have given her very little.

But she’s not alone. It’s common practice for stars who were given an initial boost by the network and their awards show to stop attending. Rihanna went in 2015 to promote her video for “BBHMM” after not showing up to the show since 2008. Bey, who used to perform every time she put out an album, last performed in 2007 before showing up to perform (and only to perform — she left right after) for the 2016 ceremony. She has good reasons not to attend though. Kanye hasn’t been around since 2012. Drake? Well, despite winning heftily each time he’s nominated, the rapper hasn’t been at the awards show since 2011, and he performed on TV for the first time at the 2009 awards. And Jay Z? Good luck with that.

They might not be necessarily turning their back, but it’s kind of annoying to see stars who were given a boost in the earlier stages of their career by Black awards shows and entities to start passing on attending and supporting them. It wouldn’t be an issue at all if it weren’t for the fact that these are often the same stars who will attend and perform at every other mainstream awards show. And when they’re affected in some way that they deem discriminatory, including by the Grammys, VMAs, Billboard Awards and other big shows, they still won’t attend the BET, NAACP and Soul Train Awards. Maybe you could blame it on the actions of the people/producers behind these events, or the natural evolution of the careers of popular artists. It happens. But in Nicki’s case, to go out of your way to shade the same people who were giving you a platform while you were making faces, changing your voice and wearing multi-colored wigs and chicken necklaces when other people weren’t receptive to your talent? It’s interesting to say the least.

The post Nicki Minaj Announces She’s Not Attending BET Awards In The Shadiest Way Possible appeared first on MadameNoire.

With a quick flick of the wrist, imagine – just for a second – that you can beam off any superpower you desire. Maybe you could make anyone bend to your will, or perhaps you could read minds.

Whatever it is, you are damn good at it. So good that, as you become more settled into your superhuman ability, you develop the ho hums. You casually inspect your nails as a blinding beam of light hits your target – wham! Yawn. It’s just another typical day where someone’s putty in your hands and you’re still a badass.

But then one day, you lethargically flick that wrist of yours again on a new target, and for some odd reason, it’s not working. Flick, flick, flick – nothing!  You panic. Have your superpowers disappeared?

You frantically work your magic on someone else and, to your relief, you still “got it,” baby.

But what is it about that person? Why is she impervious to your spell? Why is it that she cannot soften into clay under your charms?

You are now intrigued.

This is the one person that stands out from all the rest and, for the first time, threatens your dominion. It scares you, challenges you, and finally, excites you.

Now what the hell, you must be wondering, does this have to do with players and how to win their hearts?

Anyone who has truly mastered the art of seduction – luring unsuspecting victims into their “love lair” – lowkey believes they have an amazing ability that makes them all-powerful. Like our superhero, there’s also an element of feeling blasé. To the player, it seems as if everyone around ’em are gullible suckers who do not have the wits to challenge him or her.

Boring!

Sure players get a rush in having their victims wrapped around their little fingers. They get a kick out of confirming that their subtle strategies, whether it’s whispering bullsh-t sweet nothings or being manipulatively Machiavellian, are infallible and fail-safe.

But the thrill is momentary.

After winning the trophy – their target woman or man – they are, once again, swept with a wave of ennui, and they’re already looking for their next victim to snag a new gold medal to hang on their wall.

In their delusions of grandeur, they’re unbeatable. They believe they’re intellectually superior and everyone else is, well, stupid AF. That’s until they stumble upon that one person who is strangely impenetrable to their seductive schemes.

She doesn’t fluster when flattered.

She doesn’t deflate when he disappears.

She doesn’t soften as he slithers.

She is the one who intrigues him.

Though she may not defrost under a player’s spell, this doesn’t mean that she’s cold. Oh no, no, no – au contraire. In fact, she can do something no other woman has done before her and that’s warm him up – getting his heart thumping and his mind jogging – by challenging him, daring him to engage in a little brain-teasing bachata.

“I know what you’re doing,” she’d tell the player with a suggestive wink, “and that’s not what’s going to work on me.”

The player will try to exhaust every trick in the book on her – flick, flick, flick – as she dodges and swerves all his schemes, all the strategies that have worked on every other woman before her.

He’s met his match.

At the brink of defeat, he’ll then realize that the absence of game – his authentic self – is what revitalizes his puppetry over her. After a long time of dimness, a beam of light finally shoots out of his palm, hits her and she bends to his will. But this time, unlike all of his previous victims, she is a willing marionette.

He’ll fall in love knowing that he’s loved back as who he really is – not his “superhero” persona.

So the only way to win a player’s heart is to be the one person – the only person – who can knock him off his game. But then you must build ’em back up, electrifying his mind, body, and spirit, by being the challenger who’s always just one step ahead.

Kimberly Gedeon, founder of The Melody of Melanin, is a content creator with nearly 2,000 professional articles published online about everything from beauty and business to politics and pop culture. You can say hello to her on Instagram or Twitter – she doesn’t bite! 

The post This Is The Only Way To Win A Player’s Heart appeared first on MadameNoire.

“Be careful who you marry because your kids might have carpet texture hair,” warned my friend.

Carpet what? I repeated to myself. I had never heard the term before, but I refused to hit her with a snappy comeback because as ignorant as it was, it said more about her than it did me. I thought about how she, with her hair just a bit looser than mine, which ain’t that loose (without being an expert I’d call mine a 4c) had really bought into the hair hierarchy. And now she was telling me how to pick a mate. She probably felt a sense of urgency because I had just started getting serious with a guy from Africa. With both our nappy heads she probably envisioned a family so full of carpet that if we all lied down on the floor people would walk right over us.

Five years later, we had a beautiful carpet-texture-haired baby. From day one, her hair did not slick down from the baby oil that comes with every baby shower gift. If I am to be perfectly honest, it made me a little uncomfortable. Though I had been wearing my hair natural for at least six years, four of them with locs, I had never been one to embrace the picked out look, though I loved in on people like Cicely Tyson and Angela Davis. I was still trying to emulate a look that I felt was pretty and acceptable so I spent the majority of my time twisting and weighing my hair down with products designed to “bring out the natural curl.” So when I looked at my baby with a full head of carpet texture hair I wondered if it might make for a harder life. This was before Instagram and people everywhere were rocking short naturals. And let’s me be real for a minute, rare is the baby or little girl who is rocking a short, picked out fro. Whenever we went places, Black women would appear out of thin air, giving me advice on what products I could use to make her hair grow. As she got older they’d recommend hair braiders.

It’s interesting though, because after a few years, I started looking at her hair, and the simplicity of her life, and it was much easier than mine. While I was spending all my time fighting with my carpet texture, she was embracing hers.

One day, I decided that I’d had enough crèmes and leave-ins and I couldn’t do another two-strand twist. So I went to a barber named Deana in LA, who was referred by my hairdresser and friend Felicia Leatherwood. I didn’t even know what I wanted, I just knew that it needed to look and feel like freedom. And when she was done I had a short, asymmetrical cut that I loved!  The best part was that all I had to do was pick it out, pat it down, and go!

My daughter is 7 ½ years old now and we’re both in a great place with our hair. It’s not to say that she hasn’t had any issues. When she was in preschool a little girl told her that her hair was “ugly.” But she breezed right through it telling the girl, “You don’t know what you’re talking about, my hair is beautiful!” Damn right.

I tell her, and my second daughter whose hair is short and thicker than everybody’s, that same thing everyday. It’s what I never heard growing up. Who was going to tell a nappy-headed kid that her hair was beautiful back then? It also helps that I’m surrounded by a gorgeous group of Black women with bald, short, and all kinds of textured hair. I’m a huge instawhore so I’m constantly showing both my daughters pictures of beautiful Black women with short naturals. Then there’s the gorgeous, graceful, 10-year-old Jade Jackson who rocks her carpet texture like a little queen. I think what might help the most is seeing me, her mom, comfortable in the hair I’m in. I can’t wait for the day that I can explain to her that she was the biggest gift I could ever have in my own hair journey.

Follow Erickka Sy Savané on Twitter, Instagram, and www.Erickkasysavane.com

The post “Be Careful Who You Marry Because Your Kids Might Have Carpet Texture Hair” appeared first on MadameNoire.

Credit: Ivan Nikolov/WENN.com

Well that didn’t take long. After a surprising revelation Friday that Kenya Moore married a mystery man in St. Lucia about a week ago, we assumed the unveiling of her groom wouldn’t happen before season 10 of “Real Housewives of Atlanta” (RHOA). But lo and behold, Kenya couldn’t contain herself for long, posting photos of the big day on Instagram over the past couple of days.

The first photo came by way of Father’s Day wishes the reality star posted openly to her new hubby.

“To my husband,  Happy Father’s Day to you and all the great Dads,” she wrote. “We met a year ago but didn’t speak again until December. Since we reconnected you have been my everything, my one and only, my heart…I love you.
#devotedwife#family#happyfathersday#truelove#bliss“

It wasn’t until last night, however, that we had a name to match the face: Marc, whom Kenya said on the photo below is the best man she’s ever known.

In a teasing post a few days prior, Kenya also shared this image declaring “A good man is hard to find but true love is even harder. I found both.”

Beyond all of those newlywed love notes, the most insightful post — and the only one Kenya has allowed comments on — is the scenic image she posted this morning, reflecting on how not just her life, but she, has changed.

“Over the last months I have learned a lot about myself,” she said. “I reflected and realized that changing my behavior starts with me. I will not be defined by my previous mistakes or bad decisions.

“My life is what is in front of me and not the things I left behind. Thank you God for this wisdom. Thank you God for my new life.
#blessed#kenyamoore“

Sounds like we might see a new Kenya on next season of RHOA. What do you think?

The post Kenya Moore’s Husband Is No Longer A Mystery appeared first on MadameNoire.

If, from the outside looking in, women of color and women of a certain size feel neglected, dismissed, and ignored by the fashion industry, imagine how difficult it must be to actually be a part of that industry, but not really. To be a token of sorts, one of the few who was let in to the secret society, that’s the experience Black plus-size model Philomena Kwao discusses in a new EPIX documentary, Straight/Curve.

As the name might suggest, Straight/Curve explores the unrealistic beauty standards that have come to define the fashion industry and the damaging effects they have on women and girls.

“Ninety percent of young women and girls say they do not feel represented in the fashion industry or in media, and that the imagery they consume on a daily basis makes them feel ‘disgusting’ and ‘less than,'” a press release notes. “Straight/Curve examines the industries and obstacles responsible for this body image crisis and showcases the dynamic leaders fighting for more diversity of size, race and age.”

Those leaders include household name Tim Gunn and several models, from Emme, Denise Bidot, Tess Holliday, Iskra Lawrence, and Charlie Howard, to Jennie Runk, Sabina Kanson, Nathalia Novaes, Robyn Lawley, Sasha Exeter, Nicola Griffin, Erica Kraeter and, of course, Kwao.

In the clip below, Kwao talks about being narrowly defined by her skin color and her size, and how being one of a few plus-size models of color is quite a lonely experience. Check out the sneak peek of the documentary in the video below which airs on EPIX at 8 pm ET Wednesday, June 21.

The post Philomena Kwao: It’s Lonely Being A Black Plus-Size Model appeared first on MadameNoire.

She can relate to the fights

He can feel teamed up on

You’re Eskimo sisters…

You’ll swap vacation stories

His parents already know you

Her parents are a bit confused

Some friends stop trusting you

People always ask her if she’s okay

Your friend and your man may still fight

Her new bf and her ex have to hang out

You know all about their sex life

You work hard to make things different

You keep an eye out for old patterns

She still has his gifts

In ten years, nobody will care

The post What It’s Really Like To Date Your Friend’s Ex appeared first on MadameNoire.

You’ve likely heard that Jada Pinkett Smith is none too fond of the new Tupac Shakur biopic, All Eyez on Me. She stated that the portrayal of her very close relationship with the rapper, who was killed at the age of 25, was overly dramatized to a level that she can’t keep quiet about.

“Forgive me,” she wrote on Twitter, “my relationship to Pac is too precious to me for the scenes in All Eyez On Me to stand as truth.”

The 45-year-old would go on to point out inaccuracies involving the portrayal of their friendship before saying, “The reimagining of my relationship to Pac has been deeply hurtful.” However, she did celebrate the actors who portrayed the late rapper and herself, newcomer Demetrius Shipp, Jr. and Kat Graham.

“To @KatGraham and @Dshippjr this is no fault of yours,” she wrote. “Thank you for bringing so much heart and spirit to your roles. You both did a beautiful job with what you were given. Thank you both.”

But Graham, known for her work on The Vampire Diaries, told EOnline.com that considering Pinkett Smith allegedly had nothing but good things to say about the film leading up to her tweets, she’s taken aback by the star’s disappointment with the project.

“When I first got the role, I reached out to (her) a year and a half ago,” she said at the iHeart Radio MMVAs in Toronto yesterday. “The point of reaching out to her, as well as the other producers on the film, was to insure the integrity of the story and the character. I even spoke to her last week and she had nothing but support.”

Graham continued, “I have a lot of love for her. I hope people just see the movie and make the choice for themselves.”

Despite the mixed reviews from the likes of Smith and even rapper 50 Cent, who said after seeing the money, “that was some bullsh-t,” since being released on Friday (Pac’s 46th birthday), All Eyez on Me has surpassed monetary expectations. It landed in the third spot at the box office with $27.1 million when it was believed that the film would open with just around $17 million.

The post “She Had Nothing But Support”: Kat Graham Confused By Jada’s Criticism Of Tupac Biopic appeared first on MadameNoire.

As excited for a new album from Goapele as we are? Check out our interview as she talks “Dreamseeker” and working with BJ the Chicago Kid.

The post Goapele Talks New Album “Dreamseeker” appeared first on MadameNoire.

Perri "Pebbles" Reid

Ike Turner

Lil Kim

Suge Knight

Stacy Lattisaw

Winnie Mandela

Michael Oher

Timbaland

Lisa Celeste Stroud

The Houstons

We have dealt with her every emotion from the day she was born until the day she died, which gives us absolute position and absolute authority as a family to feel the way we do about her legacy. We matter. We’re still here. Why wasn’t there a call to myself, Gary, Cissy or even her daughter? Why deny selected members of the family an advanced copy of the film? As we once again enter a season of bereavement and the strategic timing so close to the anniversary of Whitney’s death, this is a disappointment that any of us who loved her could do without. This creative pursuit at the expense of the integrity of such an iconic woman, who is voiceless today, reeks of condemnation and deceit. It reeks of enslavement to an industry that will likely do the same to you one day. As my grandmother used to say, “Keep living.”

The post Put Some Respeck On My Name: Celebrities Upset By Their Depictions In Biopics appeared first on MadameNoire.

Sad news for hip-hop fans today. Rapper Prodigy of the Queens-bred group Mobb Deep has passed away at the age of 42.

Born Albert Johnson, the rapper has battled sickle cell anemia since he was born. In a statement from his publicist on Tuesday, the rapper’s rep stated that he was in Las Vegas for a show on Saturday, and soon after, was hospitalized “for complications caused by a sickle cell anemia crisis.” Still, the rep added that the exact cause of death is unclear at this time.

“It is with extreme sadness and disbelief that we confirm the death of our dear friend Albert Johnson, better known to millions of fans as Prodigy of legendary NY rap duo Mobb Deep,” the statement read according to the Associated Press. “We would like to thank everyone for respecting the family’s privacy at this time.”

The “Shook Ones” and “Quiet Storm” rapper, one part of Mobb Deep alongside fellow rapper Havoc, spoke openly about his battles with sickle cell anemia. After going to prison in 2007 for three years following a sentence for criminal possession of a weapon, Prodigy said he decided to make his greatest effort to make his health a priority. The fact that he’d lived so long with the disorder, to the rapper, was a gift.

“To me, it’s a blessing from God, number one,” he said in an interview with ThisIs50. “Secondly, I take care of my health. I don’t f–k around. I learned how to do that a long time ago. There was years I was slippin’. I had many years where I was slippin’. I fell off on my health s–t. I was drinking and doing all the wrong s–t. When I got locked up, it actually helped me get my s–t back together because you ain’t got access to none of that s–t no more.”

“Plus, when you’re in jail, that’s the worst place you could ever be to have sickle cell,” he added. “You will die in that muthaf–ker. Them ni–as don’t care if you screaming in pain. If they don’t see blood, if they don’t see you unconscious with blood, they not taking you to the hospital. So, I had to get myself together. I had to get my health together to make sure I wasn’t going to get sick in there. I started working out. I was eating right, drinking mad water and just doing what I had to do to stay healthy.”

The post Rapper Prodigy Of Mobb Deep Dies At 42 After Long Health Battle appeared first on MadameNoire.